The Nebraska Football Fan’s Guide To The SEC Network

Being in the Big Ten for a few seasons now, Husker fans have seen all sorts of Big Red sports on BTN including Nebraska football, basketball and baseball.

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It’s old hat and the best part is it looks like BTN is ramping up their efforts to compete with the newly minted SEC Network.

Husker fans as a whole may think they know what the SEC Network’s all about, but that’s likely not true.

For example, you’d expect its inaugural broadcast day to include a 24-hour marathon of football dominance when instead, Tim Tebow gets a birthday cake.

It’s this kind of innovative programming that kills the notion of the network simply being a propaganda tool.

For example, here’s a full day’s worth of programming just to show you how committed the conference is to diverse entertainment.

5:30 A.M.: Reveille with Reveille
5:31 A.M.: Live feed of Nick Saban reading Sun Tzu’s “The Art of War”
6:00 A.M.: Good Gat Dang Morning! feat. Steve Spurrier, Harvey Updyke and Stop Girl
9:00 A.M.: Les Miles’ Shadow Puppetry Hour
10:00 A.M.: The Astounding Five Star Magic Show with Hugh Freeze
10:30 A.M: Live feed of Nick Saban watching film
10:45 A.M.: Bret Bielema or Rob Riggle?
11:00 A.M.: Mark Richt’s Outta Control Country Kitchen
12;00 P.M.: Whatever The Hell This Is
12:15 P.M: Live feed of Nick Saban picking up his laundry
12:25 P.M.: Verne Lundquist’s Chortle! Chortle! Chortle!
1:00 P.M.: SEC Glazed Over Challenge feat. Lane Kiffin
1:30 P.M.: Kentucky Football Highlights
1:31 P.M.: Early Cuyler Teaches Recruiting: Making Your Highlight Taperry
2:00 P.M.: National Championships and Loopholes
3:00 P.M.: Live feed of Nick Saban eating a cupcake
3:10 P.M.: Heads Up! Throwing Mechanics feat. Tim Tebow and Jesse Palmer
4:00 P.M:  The Best of Brent Musberger’s Oglings
5:00 P.M.: Mike Slive’s State of the NCAA
5:30 P.M.: Vandy’s Playdate: Writing a Proper Resume
6:00 P.M.:  CSI: Knoxville
7:00 P.M.: Misery in Missouri: The Blaine Gabbert Story
9:00 P.M.: Jorts: Florida Campus Cop Patrol
10:00 P.M.: SEC Pickins Classics (including Florida vs. Georgia 2011)
11:00 P.M.: Story Time with Will Muschamp
12:00 A.M.: Midnight Yell (Yep. Every night)
1:00 A.M.: Live Call-In Tarot with Jennifer Bielema
2:00 A.M.: Pillah Talk with PAWWWWWWWWWWLLLLL
3:30 A.M.: Live feed of Nick Saban snoring on his office couch
3:40 A.M.: Body by Bret (INFOMERCIAL)
5:00 A.M.:  On Everyone’s Short List feat. Dan Mullen

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